Apparently “whip your hair” is symbolic for being truthful to yourself. When I was nine that meant building lego cities, pretending I was C3PO, and sending Barbie’s dreamcar down the driveway full of firecrackers. Apparently now it means Jackson Pollocking some walls with your weave. The only reason I even had a vague idea of symbolism was because Sister Audry attempted to explain the notion of Transubstantiation to 30 nine year olds. EPIC FAIL.
If I were to release a single back in the nineties it would have been based off a short story I wrote in third grade with Dennis the Dinosaur Rodman, Scotty the Snake Pippin, and Michael the Monkey Jordan. The music video would have been shot on my neighbors playhouse jungle gym using gummi bears I bought at the Piggly Wiggly as backup dancers and Mighty Max standing in for me.
